REVIEW: Unfriended: Dark WebBy Bri ManzanoJuly 22, 2018I’m a horror lightweight. Generally, I’m more inclined to watch a suspense film than a slasher flick. Sure, the line between the two can be thin and hard to distinguish, but as soon as the “horror” label is involved, I usually walk away. Too rich for my blood. Let that stand as proof enough that Unfriended: Dark Web is lacking in basically the only thing you want from a horror movie: genuine scares.

Matias (Colin Woodell) finds a laptop in the lost and found at his local cafe and decides “hey, finders, keepers.” He soon finds that thievery does no one good, as his new find ends up biting him in the butt. It’s the workstation for a dark web content creator - i.e., kidnapper, torturer, all-around scumbag. And he wants it back.

Of course, the format is intriguing. As technology evolves and connects people and creates more media for entertainment, film has to evolve in tow in order to survive, and of course that means taking advantage of the thing that captivates us even as we sit in the theater: social media. The concept is moderately novel, and at its core there’s something really interesting. It’s kind of the new found-footage, with a real-time twist.

The thing is, though, scares and technology don’t mix very well. Tech and film hardly mix, let alone a film genre that is already hard to get right. The pacing, which is so key to the horror genre, is strange, and the characters make frustrating choices (though they’ve learned their lesson about screensharing). But when it comes down to it, it’s just not scary. I’m watching The Prestige as I write this review and the moment Hugh Jackman gets shocked by the electric fence scared me more than anything in Dark Web.

If you want a truly terrifying dark web immersive experience, you might look into an indie game called “Welcome to the Game.” It’s like Unfriended: Dark Web, but better, actually decently scary, and you get a lot more dark web for your buck.

Rating: 3/10

Favorite scene: didn’t really have one.
Least favorite scene: have some fun.

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